I Want a Theme Song

If you could have your own personal theme song, what would it be? Maybe it’s the heavy influence of musical theatre during my formative years, but I feel like real life events should include people randomly breaking out in song and cleverly choreographed dance at any given moment.

Picture it – you walk through the doors into your local grocery store. A gentle breeze ruffles your hair as you dance your way through the produce section, and you break out into song when you discover mangoes are on sale. Nearby shoppers smile with delight as they fall into step with you, flawlessly executing a flash mob grapevine past the Deli counter, accepting their packets of freshly shaved gourmet ham and smoked gouda as they twirl by.

This little fantasy is what’s making me smile today. I mean, c’mon – my dog has a theme song. Why shouldn’t I??

I’m actually not kidding about my dog. She has her own song. Why? Because I am an idiot.

Miss Daisy is my 4 year old rough collie. She joined our family shortly after we moved back to Winnipeg. Our first collie, Princess, was terribly depressed after our move. She was missing all her Calgary dog friends and off leash play dates. There is very little that is more heartbreaking to a dog person than a lonely, depressed, morose dog. We decided that it was time for Princess to have a baby brother or sister.

We started the search. Our friends back in Calgary were searching with us and found a collie litter in Alberta, not far from Calgary. They sent pictures, we sent money, and the deal was done. I saw that sweet little face, and knew her name needed to be Daisy. There is no great significance to the name Daisy for me – she just looked like a Daisy to me, and the name stuck.

Our friends arranged to pick her up and drive her to meet me halfway. But first, there was a Puppy Party in the Sobeys parking lot with another one of my dog friends, and our daughter, who still lived in Calgary.

Daisy was hugged and kissed and fully loved up on, and then they hit the road. I met them in Medicine Hat, at the little roadside motel where I had booked a room for the night. One look at little Miss Daisy and I was smitten. We spent an uneventful night, and she slept most of the drive back to Winnipeg the next day. I felt so lucky to have such a sweet, calm, quiet puppy!

When I arrived home with our new little furry bundle of joy, I was met with conflicting responses from our two dogs.

I know – we have three dogs now. It’s a lot. I may have a problem that requires professional assistance, but, for now at least, it’s working for me. If I consider adding a fourth fur kid to the family, it will be time to stage an intervention. Send help.

Tiki, our then 9 yr old Corgi/Chihuahua mix, took one look at the puppy in my arms, turned her back to me, and refused to come near me or even make eye contact for three solid days.

Princess, then 4 yrs old, was curious and intrigued with her new sister, but mostly she was worried about her status as my favorite. She would sniff at the puppy, then circle back to me for hugs and butt scratches and constant reassurance that I loved her best. By the next day, she and her new baby sister were inseparable.

As we are wont to do in our family, Daisy was quickly bestowed with a nickname or two. She’s a nut job, so Crazy Daisy was obvious, rapidly followed by Dammit Daisy, when she chewed up the linoleum floor. I mean, I didn’t like that flooring anyway, but still. And don’t get me started on Daisy vs. the carpet.

The name she likes best, however, is Daisy Dukes.

This is a true story.

I called her to come in from the backyard one day, yelling “Daisy, come!” She looked at me over her shoulder and turned away from me, completely ignoring my command.

“Daisy! Come here, now!”

Nope.

“Daisy Dukes!”

She at least looked at me then.

And that’s when it happened. That was the moment my impulsive behavior revealed my occasional idiocy.

I sang her song.

You know the Baby Shark song? The one that makes your eyes roll, your ear drums itch, and your annoyance tolerance vanish? Yup – that’s the one. I substituted the words, and started singing, “Dai-sy Duke doo doo doo doo doo doo, Daisy Duke doo doo doo doo doo doo, Daisy Duke doo doo doo doo doo doo, Daisy Dukes!”

She grinned and came running.

Hilarious, right?? It was funny, for about a week. Except now she expects me to sing her song whenever I want her to come inside. Her theme song is the price of her obedience.

Also, she’s a barker, and the only way I can get her to stop is to shoot her with a super shooter water gun. I bought a two-pack at Costco, so I can have one at the front door and one at the back door. The tiny dollar store water gun works in my office when she’s barking at anything that remotely looks like an animal on TV, or other dogs walking by our house on their daily strolls. You can tell where Daisy has been surveying the neighborhood by the drool marks on the window.

My neighbor’s kids find all of this highly entertaining. They also assist with her training, so that’s helpful. I love it when the two-yr-old wags her finger at the dogs from their side of the fence, saying in her sternest voice, “Hush guys!” I am toying with the idea of gifting them with their own super shooter so they can shoot the dogs for me when I’m not outside. So far, their parents do not think this is the best idea. That may have something to do with the number of times they have overheard me yell, “Don’t make me shoot you!”

Hey – I’ll take all the training help I can get, because, apparently, I am hopeless at saying NO to those fuzzy brown-eyed faces.

So, now, because I am hopelessly caught in a questionable cycle of codependence with my dogs, I want a theme song too. After discussing it with my friend during our dog walk yesterday, she sent me an audio clip. I’m pretty sure you’ll hear the tune in your head when you read the lyrics:

I get knocked down, but I get up again. You’re never gonna keep me down. I get knocked down, but I get up again. You’re never gonna keep me down…

Chumbawamba

It’s awesome to have a friend who knows me so well.

What’s your theme song? Need help picking one? Ask a friend. Share your theme song in the comments – maybe we will get one step closer to that musical theatre world in my brain becoming reality.